I have a friend who works in an ambulance. He likes to talk about various interesting cases that happened to him or his patients at work.
Among others, I heard many stories from him when a person was taken to the hospital with a foreign object in the anus. And so, after another story, he tells me an anecdote:
Two people come to see a traumatologist: one of them has his arm, up to the elbow, stuck in the other’s ass. The doctor looked at this couple from under his glasses and said angrily:
- Actually, this is a medical facility, not a puppet theater!
Laughed until I cried
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I have a friend who works in an ambulance. He likes to talk about various interesting cases that happened to him or his patients at work. Among others, I heard many stories from him when a person was taken to the hospital with a foreign object in the anus. And so, after another story, he tells me an anecdote:
Two people come to see a traumatologist: one of them has his arm, up to the elbow, stuck in the other’s ass. The doctor looked at this couple from under his glasses and said angrily: - Actually, this is a medical facility, not a puppet theater!
[quote=Bolbol post_id=379017 time=1717755454 user_id=7207] [quote=Venus post_id=379011 time=1717754342 user_id= 15698] ))) Ahah, don’t be offended, but this joke is true of life)))
Men in the clinic are divided into two categories: — mom brought; — wife brought. [/quote]
I also came for a certificate from a therapist for a remote medical examination. [ /quote]
Bolbol: ↑07 Jun 2024, 03:17
I also came for a certificate from a therapist for a remote medical examination.
Sorry, but I didn’t understand anything...
In the North, since the late 90s, a medical examination from home has not been recognized. Pass only on the spot.
But certificates from a therapist, narcologist, psychiatrist need to be taken home.
That’s why I went to the clinic only because of the certificate)
[quote=Venus post_id=379022 time=1717756021 user_id=15698] [quote=Bolbol post_id=379017 time=1717755454 user_id= 7207] I also came for a certificate from a therapist for a remote medical examination. [/quote] Sorry, but I didn’t understand anything... [ /quote]
In the North, since the late 90s, a medical examination from home has not been recognized. Pass only on the spot. But certificates from a therapist, narcologist, psychiatrist need to be taken home. That’s why I went to the clinic only because of the certificate)
A woman at a dentist’s appointment. While the doctor was drilling the woman’s teeth, the husband calls.
The dentist doesn’t get tired of this, he picks up the phone and says: Husband, Wait! I’ll cum now, she’ll spit and you can talk normally!
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A woman at a dentist’s appointment. While the doctor was drilling the woman’s teeth, the husband calls. The dentist doesn’t get tired of this, he picks up the phone and says: Husband, Wait! I’ll cum now, she’ll spit and you can talk normally!
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 02:59
))) Ahah, don’t be offended, but this joke is true of life)))
Men in the clinic are divided into two categories:
— mom brought;
— wife brought.
Are we now on "you"? ))
We didn’t part well enough to stay on good terms... By the way, Oksanka in particular and all the Challovites in general have long since shut up here ... and fell silent there... A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and sick people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins...
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[quote=Rabbit post_id=379024 time=1717756324 user_id=15322] [quote=Venus post_id=379011 time=1717754342 user_id= 15698] ))) Ahah, don’t be offended, but this joke is true of life)))
Men in the clinic are divided into two categories: — mom brought; — wife brought. [/quote] Are we now on "you"? )) [/quote]
We didn’t part well enough to stay on good terms... By the way, Oksanka in particular and all the Challovites in general have long since shut up here ... and fell silent there... A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and sick people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins...
[quote=Venus post_id=379032 time=1717757151 user_id=15698] and I was accused of all mortal sins... [/quote] because you are a sinner!!! :sumashed: by the way, I only go to the doctor by ambulance. How does it work like that!!! :)
[quote=Eustace post_id=379035 time=1717757612 user_id=21266] [quote=Venus post_id=379032 time=1717757151 user_id= 15698] and I was accused of all mortal sins... [/quote] because you are a sinner!!! :sumashed: by the way, I only go to the doctor by ambulance. How does it work like that!!! :) [/quote]
))) Well, you won’t be coming to me in an ambulance :cat2:
[ref=#bf0000]Eustace[/ref], You saw her You won’t be riding in an ambulance, but you’ll be leaving in an intensive care unit :ROFL: :ROFL: after stormy meetings)
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 03:45
A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and sick people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins...
n
I didn’t protect anyone. I made a remark to you, madam, which, apparently, you took as a personal insult.
But even now I am of the opinion that not all forum users are “unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people.”
You need to be softer in your judgments. Perhaps not all people are worthy of these lofty words. However, the debate on this topic is no longer interesting to me.
[quote=Venus post_id=379032 time=1717757151 user_id=15698] A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and sick people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins... [/quote] n I didn’t protect anyone. I made a remark to you, madam, which, apparently, you took as a personal insult. But even now I am of the opinion that not all forum users are “unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people.” You need to be softer in your judgments. Perhaps not all people are worthy of these lofty words. However, the debate on this topic is no longer interesting to me.
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 03:45
A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins...
I didn’t defend anyone. I made a remark to you, madam, which, apparently, you took as a personal insult.
But even now I am of the opinion that not all forum users are “unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people.”
You need to be softer in your judgments. Perhaps not all people are worthy of these lofty words. But, however, the debate on this topic is no longer interesting to me.
This was not a remark, you expressed your opinion and did not even begin to understand the situation. .. Although why didn’t they? They pretended that they didn’t, but in fact it looked very much like you were an offended Chall, one of many, with incomprehensible claims...
Well, I didn’t write about all the Chall people, but about the same ones , like you, who expressed your love to me... And also quickly deflated, just like you... Like Chall himself...
[quote=Rabbit post_id=379062 time=1717759790 user_id=15322] [quote=Venus post_id=379032 time=1717757151 user_id= 15698] A bunch of unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people, and you defended them so, so defended, and I was accused of all mortal sins... [/quote]
I didn’t defend anyone. I made a remark to you, madam, which, apparently, you took as a personal insult. But even now I am of the opinion that not all forum users are “unscrupulous, stupid and mentally ill people.” You need to be softer in your judgments. Perhaps not all people are worthy of these lofty words. But, however, the debate on this topic is no longer interesting to me. [/quote]
This was not a remark, you expressed your opinion and did not even begin to understand the situation. .. Although why didn’t they? They pretended that they didn’t, but in fact it looked very much like you were an offended Chall, one of many, with incomprehensible claims... Well, I didn’t write about all the Chall people, but about the same ones , like you, who expressed your love to me... And also quickly deflated, just like you... Like Chall himself...
Madam, as always, you are in your repertoire: you started a squabble out of nowhere.
It would be better to tell an anecdote (after all, it would correspond to the topic of discussion).
Madam, as always, you are in your repertoire: you started a squabble out of nowhere. It would be better to tell an anecdote (after all, it would correspond to the topic of discussion).
Rabbit: ↑07 Jun 2024, 05:29
Madam, you, as always, are in your repertoire: you started a mess out of nowhere.
It would be better to tell a joke (after all, it would correspond to the topic of discussion).
I wrote the joke above, and you You expressed your opinion, well, and then tried to start a fight.... You have a quarrelsome nature.
But something went wrong and it didn’t work out...
Well then, keep your feelings to yourself and tell jokes.
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[quote=Rabbit post_id=379089 time=1717763384 user_id=15322] Madam, you, as always, are in your repertoire: you started a mess out of nowhere. It would be better to tell a joke (after all, it would correspond to the topic of discussion). [/quote]
I wrote the joke above, and you You expressed your opinion, well, and then tried to start a fight.... You have a quarrelsome nature. But something went wrong and it didn’t work out... Well then, keep your feelings to yourself and tell jokes.
niqk: ↑07 Jun 2024, 06:27
This anecdote is perhaps the coolest...
I didn’t expect it myself)
Sent after 7 minutes 48 seconds:
Frostdemon: ↑07 Jun 2024, 03:44
A woman at the dentist’s appointment. While the doctor was drilling the woman’s teeth, the husband calls.
The dentist doesn’t get tired of this, he picks up the phone and says: Husband, Wait! I’ll finish now, she’ll spit and you can talk normally!
Such jokes are born from life))
This is from the series: nSoviet years. Crowded bus. A drunk man tries to compromise a ticket, but instead of a puncher, he pokes the grandmother sitting under him in the forehead. The old woman can’t stand it, and at the very first stop, she says publicly:
- Milok, hurry up, while it’s still standing!
[quote=niqk post_id=379114 time=1717766872 user_id=218] This anecdote is perhaps the coolest... [/quote] & #129315;🤣& #129315; I didn’t expect it myself)
[size=85] [color=green]Sent after 7 minutes 48 seconds:[/color][/size ] [quote=Frostdemon post_id =379030 time=1717757076 user_id=23130] A woman at the dentist’s appointment. While the doctor was drilling the woman’s teeth, the husband calls. The dentist doesn’t get tired of this, he picks up the phone and says: Husband, Wait! I’ll finish now, she’ll spit and you can talk normally! [/quote] Such jokes are born from life)) This is from the series: nSoviet years. Crowded bus. A drunk man tries to compromise a ticket, but instead of a puncher, he pokes the grandmother sitting under him in the forehead. The old woman can’t stand it, and at the very first stop, she says publicly: - Milok, hurry up, while it’s still standing!
Two men are talking about sex: What is your favorite position? Behind Why? No need to make a happy face
Sent after 6 minutes 46 seconds:
Women often say that men think with what is between their legs.
Then it’s quite understandable why women don’t think at all...
These users thanked the author Frost Demon for the post:
Two men are talking about sex: What is your favorite position? Behind Why? No need to make a happy face
[size=85][color=green]Sent after 6 minutes 46 seconds:[/color][/size] Women often say that men think with what is between their legs. Then it’s quite understandable why women don’t think at all...
[quote=niqk post_id=379128 time=1717769665 user_id=218] And they do it right! First of all, she has a man. And secondly, she already has her mouth full of troubles... [/quote] It’s time to do your own stand-up 🤣
Rabbit: ↑07 Jun 2024, 05:45
stop apologizing to me, I forgave you a long time ago
This anecdote is perhaps the coolest...
TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... He got bored there...
I have an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth.
[quote=niqk post_id=379114 time=1717766872 user_id=218] [quote=Rabbit post_id=379095 time=1717764337 user_id= 15322] stop apologizing to me, I forgave you a long time ago [/quote]
This anecdote is perhaps the coolest... [/quote]
TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... He got bored there... I have an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth.
[quote=niqk post_id=379143 time=1717771116 user_id=218] [ref=#bf0000]Venus[/ref], don’t you suspect , that almost everyone here is mentally retarded? [/quote]
))) No, the majority here have developed intelligence))) but there are a few fools...
[quote=Venus post_id=379145 time=1717771302 user_id=15698] [quote=niqk post_id=379143 time=1717771116 user_id= 218] [ref=#bf0000]Venus[/ref], and don’t you suspect that almost everyone here is mentally retarded? [/quote]
))) No, the majority here have developed intelligence))) but a few are fools there is... [/quote] Well, I’m definitely such a fool - I spend so much free time on the forum on all sorts of crap!
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 07:33
TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... he got bored there...
I there is an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth.
I have a proposal: let’s create a separate topic - "debate with Marinka" And in this thread we will discuss who were born mentally retarded and who lost their minds already on the forum
And I would like to leave this topic for humor. You do not mind?
[quote=Venus post_id=379139 time=1717770822 user_id=15698] TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... he got bored there... I there is an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth. [/quote] I have a proposal: let’s create a separate topic - "debate with Marinka" 🙂 And in this thread we will discuss who were born mentally retarded and who lost their minds already on the forum 😀 And I would like to leave this topic for humor. You do not mind?
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 07:33
TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... he got bored there...
I have an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth.
I have a proposal: let’s create a separate topic - "debate with Marinka " And in this thread we will discuss who were born mentally retarded and who lost their minds already on the forum
And I would like to leave this topic for humor. Do you mind?
So this topic was for humor. Good topic.
I don’t understand why you made a fuss about it
[quote=Rabbit post_id=379155 time=1717771860 user_id=15322] [quote=Venus post_id=379139 time=1717770822 user_id= 15698] TS is another offended chall... he told me how good it is there and how wonderful they are there and how bad I am, and now he crawled here... he got bored there... I have an assumption that he is mentally retarded... from birth. [/quote] I have a proposal: let’s create a separate topic - "debate with Marinka " 🙂 And in this thread we will discuss who were born mentally retarded and who lost their minds already on the forum 😀 And I would like to leave this topic for humor. Do you mind? [/quote]
So this topic was for humor. Good topic. I don’t understand why you made a fuss about it :cat1:
[quote=Bolbol post_id=379017 time=1717755454 user_id=7207] [quote=Venus post_id=379011 time=1717754342 user_id= 15698] ))) Ahah, don’t be offended, but this joke is true of life)))
Men in the clinic are divided into two categories: — mom brought; — wife brought. [/quote]
I also came for a certificate from a therapist for a remote medical examination. [ /quote] My wife also sent me to the clinic😄
[size=85][color=green]Sent later 5 minutes 38 seconds:[/color][/size] [quote=niqk post_id=379151 time=1717771556 user_id=218] [quote=Venus post_id=379145 time=1717771302 user_id=15698] [quote=niqk post_id=379143 time=1717771116 user_id=218] [ref=#bf0000]Venus[/ref], don’t you suspect that almost everything here - mentally retarded? [/quote]
))) No, the majority here have developed intelligence))) but there are a few fools... [/quote] Well, I’m definitely such a fool - I spend so much free time on the forum on all sorts of crap! [/quote] You’re not the only one, I have the same opinion about yourself 🤣🤣🤣
- Doctor, why is there a stripe in the middle on the tablet?
- If the patient refuses to take the medicine, then the tablet is inserted into the butt
and screwed in with a screwdriver...
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- Doctor, why is there a stripe in the middle on the tablet? - If the patient refuses to take the medicine, then the tablet is inserted into the butt and screwed in with a screwdriver...
Venus: ↑07 Jun 2024, 09:27
- Doctor, why is there a stripe in the middle on the tablet?
- If the patient refuses to take the medicine, then the tablet is inserted into the butt
and screwed in with a screwdriver...
[quote=Venus post_id=379187 time=1717777658 user_id=15698] - Doctor, why is there a stripe in the middle on the tablet? - If the patient refuses to take the medicine, then the tablet is inserted into the butt and screwed in with a screwdriver... [ /quote]
I once came across this expression: “Sometimes they fucking die!” I thought it was just a joke, like it rhymed and that’s it. I haven’t talked to one doctor yet. He worked on a smelter and said:
There was a departure, the body of a woman, a man called. We’ve arrived. The police question the man, the doctor examines the corpse, and listens with one ear. The man says, “I met a woman, called her over. I’m lying there, she’s jumping on me, with her back to me. Suddenly she wheezed. Well, I think she’s cumming. I bent her forward and fucked her.” The medic finished, comes up, pats the man on the shoulder "I have "good" news for you. From the moment she wheezed, you fucked a corpse"
I once came across this expression: “Sometimes they fucking die!” I thought it was just a joke, like it rhymed and that’s it. I haven’t talked to one doctor yet. He worked on a smelter and said: There was a departure, the body of a woman, a man called. We’ve arrived. The police question the man, the doctor examines the corpse, and listens with one ear. The man says, “I met a woman, called her over. I’m lying there, she’s jumping on me, with her back to me. Suddenly she wheezed. Well, I think she’s cumming. I bent her forward and fucked her.” The medic finished, comes up, pats the man on the shoulder "I have "good" news for you. From the moment she wheezed, you fucked a corpse" :unknown:
Since we’re talking about doctors and butts, here’s an anecdote:
Doctor Watson asks for advice from his doctor friend:
- You know, colleague, I want to stop my friend, Sherlock, from smoking. Tell me how to do this?
- He smokes a pipe? Well, stick the phone up your ass and put it back in its place. Your friend will smoke once, vomit, and quit. Doesn’t help the first time, repeat the procedure.
A month has passed.
- Well, how are you doing, dear Watson?
- What a success here.... Sherlock smokes just as he smoked. But... I can’t do without a tube in my butt anymore.
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Since we’re talking about doctors and butts, here’s an anecdote: Doctor Watson asks for advice from his doctor friend: - You know, colleague, I want to stop my friend, Sherlock, from smoking. Tell me how to do this? - He smokes a pipe? Well, stick the phone up your ass and put it back in its place. Your friend will smoke once, vomit, and quit. Doesn’t help the first time, repeat the procedure. A month has passed. - Well, how are you doing, dear Watson? - What a success here.... Sherlock smokes just as he smoked. But... I can’t do without a tube in my butt anymore.
Rabbit: ↑07 Jun 2024, 09:36
Well, stick your pipe up your butt
there is another joke about a pipe.
On the ship the boatswain stands smoking a pipe. A sailor approaches.
"What kind of tobacco do you have, comrade boatswain? "
"This is hair from the pussy of the woman he loves!"
The sailor realized and left.
On the next voyage, the sailor is already standing smoking a pipe. The boatswain approaches.
"Ugh, what’s that stink? "
"Hair from the pussy of the woman you love! "
"Took too close to the ass, sailor!"
[quote=Rabbit post_id=379197 time=1717778179 user_id=15322] Well, stick your pipe up your butt [/quote] there is another joke about a pipe. On the ship the boatswain stands smoking a pipe. A sailor approaches. "What kind of tobacco do you have, comrade boatswain? " "This is hair from the pussy of the woman he loves!" The sailor realized and left. On the next voyage, the sailor is already standing smoking a pipe. The boatswain approaches. "Ugh, what’s that stink? " "Hair from the pussy of the woman you love! " "Took too close to the ass, sailor!"
Master of dumplings: ↑07 Jun 2024, 09:35
I once came across this expression: "Sometimes they fucking die!" I thought it was just a joke, like it rhymes and that’s it. I haven’t talked to one doctor yet. He worked on a smelter and said:
There was a departure, the body of a woman, a man called. We’ve arrived. The police question the man, the doctor examines the corpse, and listens with one ear. The man says, “I met a woman, called her over. I’m lying there, she’s jumping on me, with her back to me. Suddenly she wheezed. Well, I think she’s cumming. I bent her forward and fucked her.” The medic finished, comes up and pats the man on the shoulder. "I have good news for you. From the moment she wheezed, you fucked a corpse."
Damn, but if this is not a story, then it’s tough, of course.
But I remembered one anecdote from my youth:
A cow ran across a field, downhill, and, unable to stop, flew between two birch trees. The impact caused his eyes to fall out of their sockets.
A hare runs past. He sees a heifer pinned between the trees. He thinks: “We need to take advantage of the situation.” He settled in behind, quickly fucked the cow and was about to leave, but he decided to look at the face to see if it was cute or not.
He walks around in front and sees that the chick’s eyes have popped out of their sockets.
- Well, - says the hare proudly, - this is not a bull pipette for you!
[quote="Master of dumplings" post_id=379196 time =1717778127 user_id=19000] I once came across this expression: "Sometimes they fucking die!" I thought it was just a joke, like it rhymes and that’s it. I haven’t talked to one doctor yet. He worked on a smelter and said: There was a departure, the body of a woman, a man called. We’ve arrived. The police question the man, the doctor examines the corpse, and listens with one ear. The man says, “I met a woman, called her over. I’m lying there, she’s jumping on me, with her back to me. Suddenly she wheezed. Well, I think she’s cumming. I bent her forward and fucked her.” The medic finished, comes up and pats the man on the shoulder. "I have good news for you. From the moment she wheezed, you fucked a corpse." :unknown: [/quote]
Damn, but if this is not a story, then it’s tough, of course. But I remembered one anecdote from my youth:
A cow ran across a field, downhill, and, unable to stop, flew between two birch trees. The impact caused his eyes to fall out of their sockets. A hare runs past. He sees a heifer pinned between the trees. He thinks: “We need to take advantage of the situation.” He settled in behind, quickly fucked the cow and was about to leave, but he decided to look at the face to see if it was cute or not. He walks around in front and sees that the chick’s eyes have popped out of their sockets. - Well, - says the hare proudly, - this is not a bull pipette for you!
The joke has been with a beard for a long time, but I remembered the word "good in bed"
Grandfather and grandmother decided to have sex. The old man didn’t succeed. He turns to the wall and grumbles:
- Putin, you bastard...
Grandma exclaims:
- What does Putin have to do with it?
- I don’t know... But under Brezhnev, such crap didn’t happen!
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The joke has been with a beard for a long time, but I remembered the word "good in bed" 🙂
Grandfather and grandmother decided to have sex. The old man didn’t succeed. He turns to the wall and grumbles: - Putin, you bastard... Grandma exclaims: - What does Putin have to do with it? - I don’t know... But under Brezhnev, such crap didn’t happen!
Anonymous, On the topic of virgins. In my lifetime there were 3 of them and I’ll tell you what. The main problem is not that they don’t understand where to poke their pussies without instructions,...
Why was cunnilingus never a mandatory attribute of sex, but blowjob was?
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There are several reasons. Probably the fact is that, according to tradition, the man takes and the woman gives.
Gives - that means she must give a blowjob. But cunnilingus is a secondary matter,...
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by the way, I only go to the doctor by ambulance. How does it work like that!!! 
