Girls, tell me

[Elena Sokolova]

Hello, please tell me who I should contact with my daughter, she started fidgeting on objects and rubbing herself against the corners of chairs, do I need to see a gynecologist? Daughter is 5 years old.

[Alexs43]

Do you think we should contact you?

Sent after 18 minutes 19 seconds: I myself am a single father, I am raising a daughter and she is also the same age as yours, and this started for us a year ago, so this is normal, I think the child gets to know himself.

[Andrey Petrov]

Elena sokolova, Find here on the website posts of the leading gynecologist under nickname: Affectionate! It helped my daughter a lot and it will help your daughter, she will explain it to you!

[Elena Sokolova]

Thank you very much, I found it and wrote it already

[Alexs43]

Is she really a gynecologist?

[Andrey Petrov]

Alexs43, It couldn’t be more real! One of the specializations is INCEST! Practicing doctor!

[Alexs43]

Thank you, I need to find a chat too

[silver_fox]

It’s not necessary to go somewhere - it’s too early!
The funny thing is that at the age of 4-6 we begin an interesting period - the search for the first man, as a result of gender self-identification, during which we learn that we are girls! In psychology, this phenomenon is called the "Electra complex" (in boys - the "Oedipus complex"). He manifests himself by searching for the closest contact with the nearest man, with rather frank advances and a large-scale demonstration of “signs of recruitability.” Of course, there is no consciously erotic subtext there, but it often looks exactly like seductive behavior, which in fact is just a “tracing copy” of behavior observed in adults - parroting, in other words; and sometimes - very talented... Add to this jealousy towards other women with intrigues and natural scandals - and the poor fellow can only feel sorry: he will be attacked from both sides - both from an enraged wife and from snotty, intriguing daughter/stepdaughter (or whoever she is to him!).
If there is no adult man nearby, then the emotional storm raging inside can be sublimated by "replacement" therapy in the described form of autoerotic compensation for the desire for tactile and emotional contact with a “different sex” individual. Moreover, non-sex peers "sufferers" are in no way suitable for the role of such "individuals" - the level of the sought-after masculinity is critically insufficient...
What to do?
In the first case (there is a man nearby), you don’t have to do anything - it will go away on its own. Well, if a man survives without ending up either outside the marriage or even in jail, as a seducer and pedophile, he is unlikely to be able to prove anything to his angry (and supposedly “rejected”) wife, and the investigators and the other "spauld bearers" will not be puzzled by anything other than the stick.
But in the second case (there is no man nearby), a fixation on autoeroticism may persist as a means of solving psychological problems, therefore, such a “tolerant” man must be found, recruited - and thrown under the tank of the emerging feminine essence.
Maybe he will survive...
In general, sit down with the candidate for the role of the "manual" for the "combat training mission" and discuss everything properly.
P. S. Oh, I almost forgot: the "allowance" must be handcuffed to the radiator so that it doesn’t run away...
P. S.s. Important: don’t “trample down” all this fuss with a stupid total ban, no matter how much you don’t want to - along with the “excess” you have every chance of trampling the sprout of her femininity - you’ll get laid and then get married! It’s better to give her the opportunity to “test” her teeth, carefully monitoring the process, adjusting it in the direction of “this is my man, and you will find another, better one” and the like...
Now. look like that’s it. Good luck - and patience!

[Alexs43]

Thank you very interesting written

[Shalun70]

What is child masturbation? How to deal with it and is it necessary?
It is probably difficult to find a mother who would say that her child, wittingly or unwittingly, did not engage in masturbation. Most likely, someone might not have noticed. But it’s unrealistic not to pay attention to obsessive states accompanied by certain body movements in children. This means that my mother saw it, but did not attach any importance to it. Or maybe she was embarrassed to take the child to a specialist. Or I didn’t want to touch the topic at all, they say, it will outgrow it, it will go away on its own...
Is such an oversight by parents dangerous? They will now begin to calm us down from everywhere. Like, no, it’s not dangerous, it’s a natural process. And in general, it often happens to young children, because the phenomenon is common and harmless. What about the doctors? Don’t panic...

But, for mercy’s sake, now, in childhood, this is a case, and with the correct behavior of parents, you can get rid of the misfortune. Although, given our busy schedule, this is doubtful. Well, what about adolescence and adulthood? A harmful pathology, which we call a habit, will develop into neurosis and radically change a person. It ruins his life and negatively affects his psyche and physiology.

What to do if you notice that your child is engaged in masturbation? What are the reasons for the development of masturbation in children? Is it possible to somehow stop this process?


About masturbation in children

In short, we are talking about artificial irritation of the genitals organs for pleasure.

At what age do children begin to masturbate?

This is terrible, but, as practice shows, there is no age for children’s masturbation. Some attentive mothers paid attention to the fact that their babies began to engage in it in the first year of life, almost from three to four months...

What does child masturbation look like

There are enough classic manifestations of child masturbation. And one of them, as we have already noted, is artificial irritation of the genitals. But to find out whether your child suffers from this scourge, you need to watch him. Here are signs that may indicate that a child is engaged in masturbation:


- the baby regularly rubs one leg against another, crossing them and throwing them one on top of the other, blushing and groaning at the same time;
- can sway in concentration with a distant look, while actively and for a long time rubbing against the surface;
- a slightly older child, getting to know his body, can regularly touch his genitals with his hands;
- babies caress their whole body and kiss their mother, touching their genitals at these moments.

Causes of masturbation in children

There are many of them, and every attentive mother will add to the list of typical (physiological, psychological and spiritual) reasons. But let’s focus on the key ones.

Curiosity. Yes, children learn about themselves. And this is natural when they touch everything that comes to their hand, but this interest should not turn into a habit. Poor hygiene. Yes, a child can perform various actions in response to constantly appearing itching in the genitals.
The child wants to go to the toilet. This includes constipation and urinary retention. As a result, the tension caused by the rush of blood to the genitals passes into the genitals, and children begin to look for a way to discharge.
Allergies. It can also make the child want to put his hands back into his panties.
Too tight swaddling or undersized underwear.
Bad potty training experience. The child was punished when he endured and peed.
Neurosis of obsessive actions. It can be caused by the divorce of parents, a long separation from mom, and similar moments associated with experiences. Imitation. Having seen how adults engage in handjobs, children who are capable of imitation can try out of interest and then constantly show it to their organs.
Lack of parental attention. As a rule, we are talking about large and conflicting families. Children, feeling a lack of love for them, feeling unnecessary, drown out their grievances, constantly keeping their hands in their pants.
Cruel punishment. Especially if children are punished regularly and for a long time, they defend themselves with onanistic games, thus discharging nervous tension. Children at such moments can involuntarily become sexually aroused.
Force feeding. Surprised? Meanwhile, by forcing a child to eat when he doesn’t want to, you unwittingly activate the genital zones, which are associated with the mucous membranes of the lips and mouth.
Prodigal sins and the non-church life of parents. No comments...

Your reaction to manifestations of child masturbation


They say that child masturbation is not a diagnosis. Perhaps at a certain age - yes. But, if you notice that your child regularly experiences certain sensations with certain stimulation, take action. This is how parents should act in such moments.

There is no need to panic, react violently to what you see, draw the child’s attention to the problem, or hit him. After all, children are pure and innocent. Therefore, the main thing here is tact and restraint, which will help to switch their attention to something else and talk to them later. And in general, excessive attention to the situation will have the opposite effect.
There is no need to intimidate if you catch your son or daughter in the act - he is already ashamed, and in general, threats are worse than masturbation itself. Naturally, don’t even think about hitting and punishing. On the contrary, you need to reassure, reassure that you still love.
Do not focus the child’s attention on what happened, divert the conversation to the side (it is now useless), negating the growing interest in the habit of keeping his hands in his pants - A lot depends on your reaction.
Answer his questions, even the most, in your opinion, ridiculous.
Having told a child who is able to understand how harmful this habit is, clarify how disgusting this sin is before the Lord and that he must be confessed and bear the fruits of repentance.

Having understood the situation, do not let it take its course - it will not resolve by itself. Yes, the best way to get through this period of physiological masturbation without problems is your love and attention, communion and prayer, as well as an action plan.

What to do

So, you understand that your child is not out of trouble. What to do? Much depends on age. After all, some recommendations will be given to a baby who is from three months to three years old, others - to a boy or girl who is already 6-7 years old and beyond. Schematically, your actions may look something like this.


First of all, understand the reasons why the child engages in masturbation. And, as we know, there are a lot of them, and in each case there is different advice. In short, you just need to carefully read the chapter above about the reasons for the development of masturbation in children.
Second, immediately exclude the reasons for stimulation of the genital organs, associated with diseases and age, among other things. For example, pay attention more often, show your love, do not punish harshly, monitor your health and natural functions, buy comfortable underwear, do not allow the child to see intimate scenes, sleep for a long time or fall asleep, etc.
Explain in an accessible language to the child, that what he is doing is ugly and harmful. For older children, you can talk about the physiological processes that cause itching (for example, the secretion of smegma (lubricant).
Try, when showing affection to the child, not to cross the boundaries - so that he does not get excited.
Find ways to stimulate switching the child’s activities in a good direction. This could be sports or hobby groups, outdoor games, communication with peers, conversation on interesting topics, going to the theater together, etc.
If these measures do not help, and the child continues. your classes, you need to take him to the clinic - the pediatrician will give a referral to the right specialist (this could be a psychologist, a neurologist, a specialized doctor, etc.).
It is important to organize church life for the child so that he, having become older, he could confess the sin of masturbation and bear the fruits of repentance.

So, the main thing in this problem is our parental shortcomings and, if we deal with them in time, our children will grow up without them. bad habits will take place in this life.
https://mamaplus.md/ru/dezvoltarea-copi ... -nuzhno-li

[March]

What to do
So, you understand that your child is not out of trouble.

What kind of nonsense did I just read?
ALL people, without exception, jerk off. Most - from a fairly early age. And what?

[Shalun70]

Take this as a good and timely signal. At the age of 3, a kind of rehearsal of the teenage crisis occurs with the child. Yes, discoveries are being made in the field of sexuality. And that’s okay. Therefore, try now to build/restore a trusting relationship.

For a girl, a mother should ideally play not only the role of a Parent, but also the role of her closest friend. This will help both of them avoid problems in the future.

With the basin - the reaction itself was correct. But the question is - what did you manage to say to her as a punishment? If the fact that she is "bad and terrible" and generally a little monster, then this is wrong and needs to be corrected. If - regarding hygiene, and that a dog is actually germs, and that such behavior is bad (which she herself is well aware of, since she pushed the dog away) - then this is logical and normal.

At 3 years old (in terms of development, a girl can already be 4 or even 5 in comparison to a boy) - she can already talk about what the genitals are... Otherwise, where else will she learn about this at 3 years old, if not from moms? It should be very soft, delicate, warm, without excesses or unnecessary details. This will help avoid incidents in kindergarten and school. Communication in this context is structured not as Parent-Child, but as Adult-Adult. You need to keep up with the child’s growth and, thereby, recognize and respect her maturation.

Now try not to remember that incident. At least, even if I have to remember, it will be without hype and without excessive emotional overtones. Poor dog - nothing to do with it. And if you deprive them of communication, it will have the opposite effect and negative consolidation.

Therefore, the most valuable thing that happened is that you have time to restore trust between each other, which at the moment has already given crack. And this will significantly smooth out the passage of the teenage crisis at the age of 12-15.

With respect,

Konshina Anastasia, psychologist Almaty
https://www.all-psy.com/konsultacii/ otvet/166497/

[Shalun70]

What kind of nonsense did I just read?
ALL people, without exception, jerk off. Most - from a fairly early age. So what?

If you are smarter than psychologists and doctors....then excuse me...your "Highness"
You have right"my nonsense" DO NOT READ....

[March]

then excuse me... your "Highness"

It would be nice to add at the end - "Sir!"
It seems like public I read what I want. What I think is what I write.
And about "psychologists" - a very simple question for the name - "you yourself (herself), at what age did you start masturbating? And we look at the answer. If he says that he doesn’t masturbate at all, then he is not a psychologist and asshole. It’s very simple...

[Elena Sokolova]

It’s cool here on the forum, you might say it’s hot

[Shalun70]

It would be nice to add at the end - "sir!"
It seems like a public thing here. I read what I want. What I think, that’s what I write.
And about "psychologists" - a very simple question for the name - "I myself (herself), at what age did I start masturbating? And we look at the answer. If he says that he doesn’t jerking off at all means he’s not a psychologist and a cunt. It’s very simple...

God knows... I didn’t mean to be rude... but you the loshara didn’t get into the topic... With your narrow forehead, you didn’t understand that this is not about the fact that children don’t jerk off... they jerk off... and you and I jerked off... that’s not the argument here... read the whole article then the bitch makes comments... otherwise you start to look like a laugh...!!!

[March]

but you didn’t get into the topic...

Loshara, maybe not me.
Because how to post a text containing such a passage - "could confess the sin of masturbation and bear the fruits of repentance." - a sign that the person does not read what he is rewriting, or that not everything is in order with his head.

[Shalun70]

March,
Keyword POSSIBLE
I’m not here for your confession I’m watching... and why... let it be a kind of secret for you...

[SergeiKa]

Shalun70, March,
And why did they fight?... Okhalniks!
Everyone has their own view of what is happening in the world.
The question is... Everyday...
They asked what to do for the child?... Just that...
And you?... Eh!.. Gentlemen!..

[Shalun70]

SergeiKa,

The question is.. . Everyday...
They asked about the child, what to do?... Just that...

Friend, that’s the point. .. Mommy asked, I found the answer on the Internet... And then, out of nowhere, a vogmis appeared in my mouth... and like a true fighter for the rights of wankers... without reading the article (evident from the timing) I took some sentence from context... begins to "get smarter"

[SergeiKa]

What can I say?...Eat some date marmalade...And all in a bunch!

[Piero]

Elena sokolova, No, you don’t need to see a gynecologist, she you need to show it to a child psychologist (not a psychiatrist!), because the reason for this behavior is in the head, not in the pussy!