Serious relationships I preach the format of serious...

[Guest]

Serious relationships

I preach the format of serious relationships. For me, a long-term relationship with a man begins with sex. It would seem that this contradicts logic: the longer he strives, the more he appreciates. In fact, intimacy turns into a stupid goal - to persuade in any way. He invests time, money, effort. Receives a reward for perseverance and leaves into the sunset.

I am unfamiliar with the story of a man “disappearing after the first sex.” On the contrary, with hope in his eyes he asks about the second one. And then quality communication transforms communication into relationships. If a girl doesn’t want sex herself, that’s okay. But I see no reason to artificially delay and manipulate a person in order to hold on.

What do you think: is it worth postponing intimacy as long as possible?

[crazy girl]

Should you postpone intimacy as long as possible?

There is no need to postpone intimacy as long as possible, but it is better to follow the rule of three dates.

[RockstarAgency]

There is no need to put it off as long as possible, but it is better to follow the rule of three dates.

Not always, as for me. If there is interest and mutual desire, then why bother? Sometimes desire can flare up on both the first and second dates.
Why artificially restrain yourself?

[Sufia]

Few girls are ready to have sex with a person she doesn’t even know.
With this approach there will be a lot of partners.....

I think it’s not worth it have sex with everyone you meet

[crazy girl]

If there is interest and mutual desire, then why bother?

If there is no interest and desire, then you shouldn’t go on dates. Although you can sleep on the second date, you should still abstain on the first. This will only increase desires. Three dates is an average option. Two, four, five will do. You just don’t have to wait too long, otherwise they will become overripe and want too much, or the lack of sex will become a habit and the man will turn into a friend.

[WazzzzzzzUp]

Everything is individual. You need to do what both partners feel. For some, even 3 dates will not be enough, and for others, even on the first date they will understand that it’s time. Just don’t worry about it, you should enjoy it

[Alex_Tash]

Wow, necroposting! Starting message for 2019!

Few girls are ready to have sex with a person she doesn’t even know.
With this approach there will be a lot of partners.....
I I think that you shouldn’t have sex with everyone you meet

Many are ready. I would even say the majority are at least 22-25. I’m talking about the first date.
With every person you meet, of course, there is no need. Even stupid. And with everyone who you really liked + who you wanted sexually = yes, go ahead. There are not so many of these on the first date.

[Sufia]

I would even say, the majority are at least 22-25. I’m talking about the first date.

I have very few such friends. Nice and curvy girls of this age have a lot of offers, they are quite selective in their choice))
And they do not suffer from a lack of sex, so they will not succumb to fleeting sympathy.

[Alex_Tash]

I have very few such acquaintances

Perhaps because you are also a girl? And it’s not at all customary for you to talk about any such adventures and sex on the first date. They will peck their own.
I look at it from the other, male side. Sex on the first date I had it 10-12 times. One of them became my wife. But yes, women usually say nothing to each other, “how is this possible, we’re decent!”
Yes, everyone is decent, and who allows sex on the first date, and who does not. Only irreconcilable radicals on both sides of the issue are indecent.
And about "I have very few such acquaintances" I laughed something, I remembered. I recently discussed group sex with a friend. Well, on the topic of how common this is. I’m pretty outspoken about these topics. She knew what happened to me. And she said, you are the only one of all my friends who has had this happen. He burst out right in front of her and said that among our mutual acquaintances there are at least 7 people like him, of whom I know for sure. I did NOT list their names, and she herself is correct. But I was very surprised.

[WazzzzzzzUp]

I have very few such acquaintances. Nice and curvy girls of this age have a lot of offers, they are quite selective in their choice))
And they do not suffer from a lack of sex, so they will not succumb to fleeting sympathy.

From my experience, pretty and curvaceous girls of this age are simply overestimating themselves. If the partner impresses with status or money, then one date is even too much

[crazy girl]

they are just trying to fill their own price

Is it bad to know your worth?

[WazzzzzzzUp]

Is it bad to know your worth?

This is great! In an ideal world, I would be only happy with this approach, when both partners know their worth and try to build their own corner in any manifestations, comparing their importance.
But sometimes I feel bad for such girls that they are often simply taken advantage of...

[crazy girl]

they just take advantage of them...

Someone takes advantage of all of us. Without exception. One more. Others less. We use it too.

[Sufia]

WazzzzzzUp, if the girl works herself and at the same time monitors yourself, why should you choose someone who is not able to earn above the regional average (no one is talking about 100 thousand or more (I’m not talking about the capital)).
With every sex you need to remember that you can get pregnant and in this case, in the coming years, the woman will be financially dependent on the man.

If a man is not able to provide his wife with vitamins after childbirth, provide the child with basic things, and there should still be left for unforeseen situations (the jacket is torn, the child is sick, medications, perhaps an urgent appointment with the doctor), why take the risk?

A woman should take care of so that during maternity leave she could calmly take care of the child and his development, and not think about how to earn money for vitamins/food/clothes.

[WazzzzzzzUp]

Someone is using all of us. Without exception. One more. Others less. We use it too.

I absolutely agree. It’s only one thing when a person understands that he is being taken advantage of in some aspect and consciously goes for it, and it’s quite another when he doesn’t understand, and then harbors a grudge against men/women/some kind of social network. units, etc. As I wrote above, I feel offended for such people

Sofiya23, absolutely true. Initially, I wrote that there are certain conditions for the pretty and curvy girls in my circle to allow intimacy on the first date. Choosing good, wealthy men is great for women! Only further my thesis was that I was sad that there are not so many good ones, and then the girls take to heart how they are treated.

[crazy girl]

when a person understands that he is being taken advantage of in some aspect and consciously goes for it

No one will do this consciously with joy or just of your own free will. People are forced to do this by circumstances. There will most likely be resentment in such cases.
If a person does not realize, does not understand, then there is no offense. Yes, and it’s not always clear who is using whom and who is actually using whom. And, there is also a type of people who are quite comfortable being a victim or a martyr.
So, don’t rush to feel sorry for anyone.

[WazzzzzzzUp]

If a person does not realize, does not understand, then there is no offense.

I don’t agree here. If a person understands everything, then why be offended... If something goes wrong, then he himself is a fool. But if he doesn’t understand, then he starts looking for those to blame (well, he didn’t do something wrong).
There are acquaintances who happily allow themselves to be used, hoping that they will then demand that person for it, so here, too, not everything is clear.
And yes, I have already looked a little at the subject of discussion, relying only on those acquaintances whom I thought about when I wrote the post, but yours is more comprehensive. Thanks for the good comments

[Sufia]

. And, there is also a type of people who are quite comfortable being a victim or a martyr.

this is rather some kind of psychological disorder, it needs to be worked through. Such people become victims of all sorts of immoral types. It’s a pity for these...

Sent after 5 minutes 19 seconds: n

If a person is aware of everything, then why be offended...

I agree, if you know that they are being manipulated, you can turn the situation in your favor or not the moment to end the relationship.
If they offend me greatly, let’s say they specifically hurt my feelings. I can’t forgive, it turns out to quickly erase a person from my life. I understand that if they treat me badly, then such a relationship needs to end immediately.