Not enough sex

[Nobody]

Hello everyone, this is the question. I don’t have enough sex with my husband, perhaps different temperaments. No matter how much we talk, it’s no use, it’s enough for a month. There’s not enough foreplay, only when he’s hungry. Before we got married, everything was ok. And so recently I was walking in a club, a dark-skinned guy pestered me, although everyone was drunk. I immediately walked away, but now the thought of going out with someone can’t leave me, because I don’t have enough passion.. I come to the conclusion that I’m really some kind of slut, since when there is a shortage, such thoughts. I don’t allow physical infidelity yet, but what should I do??

[Brom]

Offhand there are three options:
1. Talk to your husband - honey, I miss your attention/sex
2. Buy a vibrator
3. Find a lover

[Tolyan]

Brom, The selector will not replace the lover...)

[niqk]

Well, you need to take both a vibrator and a lover. And a husband to boot! What if it comes in handy?

[Artemka022]

Hello everyone) the question is this. I don’t have enough sex with my husband, perhaps different temperaments. No matter how much we talk, there’s no point, it’s enough for a month. There’s not enough foreplay, only when he gets hungry. Before we got married everything was ok. And so recently I was walking in a club, a dark-skinned guy pestered me, although everyone was drunk. I immediately walked away, but now the thought of going out with someone can’t leave me, because I don’t have enough passion.. I come to the conclusion that I’m really some kind of slut, since when there is a shortage, such thoughts. I don’t allow physical cheating yet, but what should I do? ?

[libertine]

A vibrator will not replace a lover...)

It will not replace it, of course, but if there is not enough sex, then at least he will masturbate as much as he wants and have fun.
And she can find a lover anyway. Or fuck with anyone he wants. Why does she need a husband who does not satisfy his needs and the needs of his wife? Why is it needed then? For check? For a stamp in a passport?

[Tolyan]

Lecher, but I didn’t seem to say anything about my husband

[libertine]

I didn’t seem to talk about my husband

Yes, this has already been written on the topic. I just combined everything.

[Parenbi]

Hello everyone) the question is this. I don’t have enough sex with my husband, perhaps different temperaments. No matter how much we talk, there’s no point, it’s enough for a month. There’s not enough foreplay, only when he gets hungry. Before we got married everything was ok. And so recently I was walking in a club, a dark-skinned guy pestered me, although everyone was drunk. I immediately walked away, but now the thought of going out with someone can’t leave me, because I don’t have enough passion.. I come to the conclusion that I’m really some kind of slut, since when there is a shortage, such thoughts. I don’t allow physical cheating yet, but what to do?

And I’ll tell you from the other side. I’m not the starter’s husband (just in case). I lost my virginity to my future wife, I was ashamed to say, but I’m 27, she’s 2 years younger and I’m not her first. In our first time, the sex was awesome, several times a day with my initiative. But... 11 years have passed and now he has become much less frequent, it’s good if once a week and on her initiative. It’s like I’ve “played enough”, I want something new, variety, and not “sweat” for 30 minutes (I can’t do it before, I haven’t tried it, and the first time from fear, so generally more than 2 hours and didn’t finish). I tried to talk to her, call someone, toys, shoot or broadcast a video, and in response: “I am completely satisfied with you and I have enough of you,” to what I lack, “you are preoccupied.” I tried to "stimulate" by ignoring sex, like he’s hungry, then at least we’ll try something in an impulse, but also no....
Maybe your husband wants something, "has played enough", but is afraid to say ?

So maybe it makes sense for the husband to find out his wishes? Maybe the same??

[Nobody]

Let me add, we have a family, two children. My husband is good, and I love him. I just think cheating is mean to him, my father is a good man and a good man. But I don’t know what to do. We have vibratorseverything is there..there is also initiative on my part, it’s just that in the end it ends with the fact that he can say I’m so sleepy and that’s it, or just do his job and that’s it too) end) so often the initiator is not me) he doesn’t particularly like toys and so on. He generally thinks that I’m some kind of pervert. Is the only solution really a divorce? I don’t know, in general, maybe someone had a similar situation. What did you do? By the way, I’ve mixed it more than once, it doesn’t last long

[ilya.rozovenko]

I will organize a gentle meeting in a beautiful hotel with wine, strawberries and maximum pleasure in the form of pleasant communication, massage, kisses of all erogenous zones. I guarantee incredible new emotions, fulfillment of your desires, repeated goosebumps in your tummy and powerful orgasms

[Gudgeon]

No matter how much we talk, there’s no point, it’s enough for a month. There’s little foreplay, only when he’s hungry.before we got married everything was ok

It’s amazing how people themselves give the answer to their own question and don’t see it point blank. Think about what has changed in his life after you got married. Maybe he’s overworked, maybe he just doesn’t get enough sleep, maybe he’s weighed down by responsibility in the form of some unaffordable loans, maybe some kind of chronic prostatitis has crippled his sexual sphere, maybe it’s age, maybe he’s just bored in bed with you (monotonous), or maybe You’re blowing his mind about some reason and he’s stressed, maybe you’re always unhappy and he doesn’t want to approach you again, but there are a lot of options. The phrases “no matter how much we talk, there’s no point” and “it doesn’t last long” - hint at what you were saying, apparently, mainly, simply expressing your dissatisfaction. This is not a conversation, this is shifting responsibility. If you want to find out the reason, think that no one here will tell you, no one lives with you. And the husband is serving his conscription. Your complaints are enough for a month, but this is not a true motivational tool, it’s a divorce.

now the thought of going out with someone can’t leave me because I don’t have enough passion... but what to do??

Or solve the problem with your husband, or get a divorce. There are no family psychologists here to help you professionally (and they haven’t really helped anyone yet).

[Anorgasmia]

The phrase "no matter how much we talk, there is no point" - hints at what you were saying, apparently, mainly, simply expressing your dissatisfaction.

of course the initiator I was the one who was talking, but my husband is basically happy with everything. His work is not so hard, that is, he comes home from work and sits on the phone, there is enough time for all sorts of crap. But as for all sorts of thoughts, loans, etc., I think about them no less, and I do no less

. There are no family psychologists here to help you professionally (and they haven’t really helped anyone yet).

and I suggested a psychologist, he didn’t want to) wrote to this forum because, to be honest, it’s a shame to share this with someone close to you)
But thank you for the answer, there is something to think about because all people are different and I judge it by myself

[Gudgeon]

so I think about them no less , and I do no less

I’m not saying that you think or do less, but everyone’s stress tolerance is also different. Yes, in fact, I threw out the options like this... out of the blue, just to show that only you can find the true reason. Without being"in the situation" you won’t guess this. This is not a list that you should go check and it certainly does not claim to be complete or reliable.

But thanks for the answer, there is something to think about because all people are different and I judge it by myself

nIt’s good to talk to people who have SOMETHING to think about For some reason, I’m sure you’ll get to the bottom of this. But the answers are not here on the forum, they are there, with you.